the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
