Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
