Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
cat food counts as protein by the way
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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