i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize