I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok