I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
