I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
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She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
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Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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