I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
