There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
