the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
