is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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