sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
