Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
