Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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