i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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