called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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