Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
