No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
