it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize