ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
