Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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