I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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