Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I look better un-naked...
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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