i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
