I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
