she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The air was thick with penises
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
