im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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