It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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