I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
