A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
