Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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