Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
