biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
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I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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