im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Is her dick bigger than yours?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
