Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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