bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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