do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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