that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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