Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize