walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize