what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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