she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He? As in you personified your dick?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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