Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
