i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Sorry about my life...
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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