nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
