Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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