My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.