oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
