hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
So. Much. Porn.
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