It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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