I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize